US Woman Goes to Sweden, Transforms Her 'Bare Minimum' Expectations for Men

A Gen Z woman’s candid cultural comparison between fatherhood in the United States and that in Sweden has sparked discussion about parenting among viewers online.

“I think I’ve been ruined for American men,” said 24-year-old Emma Hughes in the viral clip posted to Instagram on April 27. “Specifically raising a child with an American man in America, because these Scandinavian dads? Chef’s kiss …”

The video, which has since amassed more than 581,000 views and over 10,000 likes, captures Hughes’ raw reaction to what she described as a parenting culture shock. A full-time nanny from Maine who is currently based in Sweden, Hughes described being taken aback by the level of fatherly involvement she observed in the country compared to the U.S.

“I was sharing about some of the ‘culture shocks’ I have had since arriving in Sweden, particularly, the dads,” Hughes, who goes by @nurturedbyemma online, told Newsweek. “It was quite frankly a bit embarrassing to be so continually surprised by seeing so many dads out in the wild; far more than I ever see in the States.”

In the video, Hughes recounted how her instinctual praise of American fathers now feels misplaced after witnessing what she sees as more equitable parenting roles in Sweden.

“Let me tell you my gut reaction when I see dads at the park with their strollers,” Hughes said in the clip. “Oh, wow, what a good dad!

“When I see more dads pushing their strollers in the park on a Saturday morning than moms, what does my brain think … That’s weird, there is something abnormal about that.”

Hughes continued: “It is so deeply telling of a lot of subconscious stuff that I have going on in my brain after working with so many families.”

Her social-media page began during the pandemic as a way to connect with other caregivers, Hughes said. Since then, it has evolved into a lifestyle platform blending content about caregiving, singleness, body positivity, faith, and travel.

Sweden’s Family-Focused System

Sweden’s approach to parenting is not new, but the viral nature of Hughes’ post has reignited a broader conversation about family policies.

Swedish law provides 480 days of paid parental leave per child, to be split between both parents, with each parent required to take a minimum of 90 days. In contrast, the U.S. has no federal mandate for paid parental leave, leaving most families reliant on unpaid time off or employer-specific policies.

“It really goes to show what happens when a culture raises boys to be attuned and capable, prioritizes families, and puts systems in place to support them,” Hughes said. “A dad seeing a need, problem-solving, and proactively finding the solution all on his own should be the bare minimum!”

Hughes recounted seeing a Swedish father purchasing size 2 diapers unprompted.

“Again, this shouldn’t be as shocking as it felt,” she added. “It’s a lot easier to be an in-tune and hands-on parent when you are legally not allowed to work more than 40 hours a week and have to take paid parental leave.”

The post’s comment section reflects a wide array of reactions, with many American viewers echoing Hughes’ sense of surprise, admiration, and, at times, frustration.

“I think it’s important to understand that this is not a difference in will or attitude that just has ‘happened’, it’s the result of political strategies with the intention to increase equality,” one viewer wrote. “So if you want more present and competent dads, vote for change!”

“I’m a Swedish dad, about to put my 4-year-old daughter to bed,” another added. “Can’t understand why dads or moms in any country can accept to have such unbalanced parenthood, I would never want to have missed out on all the time I spent with my daughter.”

“OMG [oh my God] this was me walking through Copenhagen,” a third viewer posted. “Every park all dads hanging with their kids, getting snacks, bs [bulls***]-ing with the other dads.”

“I love that you share this and I love to see this convo happen,” one comment read. “One thing I think is important to mention too is that dads in Scandinavia are taking equal loads in parenting because most Scandinavian women also work outside of the home. Being a stay-at-home mom is really not a thing in Scandinavia. Almost 90 percent of moms work outside the home. Mostly because: moms are ready to return to work after their 18 month MINIMUM paid maternity leave, have free quality daycare, and because women is that culture are go getters and powerful career earners too.”

“Long maternity and paternity leave makes a big difference,” another added.

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